To all A-list celebrities...

I would like to apologize to you for being part of the gossip chain.

There's no sinister or prying motives on my part. I will never personally violate your privacy, nor be responsible for paparazzi. And this is, truly, a very temporary phase. I have no plans to make this a career.

Of course... famous last words.

And at the very least -- I don't work for a tabloid.